Untitled (2)

That cold feeling...
The shaking...
Nauseous..
Why!
Its feels like the first time all over again!
I feel like a child, all over again!
A terrified child...
Breathing increases...
Rationality decreases...
But no matter my screams...
No matter my tears...
They couldnt give a fuck!

Tears out of the darkness (a song)

My tears fall...
The pain, burrowing in
Why does no one answer when I call?
The pain, made by him

I want to scream!
I want to cry...
Im coming apart at the seams...
I feel as if I want to die!

This pain caused by him,
Inflicted upon an innocent child like me!
My future seems so dim...
Only fear and darkness as far as I can see...

I feel so numb...
Either pain or numb...
Why was I so dumb?!
Where did this monster come from?

He liked to touch!
Not rape, but touch!
The pain is too much!
The pain... is too much

Im alive,
But I feel dead inside...
failure to thrive...
In song, I will confide

Ten YEARS!
I break down... and cry...
I cannot escape from all these fears!
Most of my life spent drowning in lies!

A/N: The song would go back between a female, and a male voice. The female voice would sound like Amy Lee, and the male voice like JD in Daddy.  Im hoping that my band TalkTall will create this song... Also we're considering a band name change... Ill let you know what it is! BTW the bold is the male voice!

Untitled (1)

I scream!
Not a liar...
It hurt!
As a child...
Its alright,
He used to say...
I scream...
No one hears me...
Oblivious to my pain,
to my fear...
What the fuck is wrong with you?!
IT HURT, as a child... and still now
But you dont care!
I never told...
Shh its a secret!
Please dont tell...
Your fault...
My fault...
whose fault?
STOP!
Looking back...
DUMB!
How did I not realize?
How did I not know?
How did I not know your lies?
My childhood is gone!
Because i loved you...
Thought you loved me too...
Guess I was wrong...
CHILD FUCKER!
MOTHER FUCK THAT NEEDS TO
BURN IN HELL FOR THIS SHIT!
This fucking think that i feel, because of you
You took advantage of me...
An innocent child...
FOR WHAT?!
Your own sick twisted delusions!
You made my childhood a faiilure...
I hate you!!

The Monster Up the Stairs (unfinished)

Just a kid...
Afraid of the monster up the stairs!
The one that preys on the helpless...
The on that kills the innocent...
Clueless to the real world...
Clueless to the pain...
Screams of silence hang on me!
Cries of the innocent inside me...
Not my fault,
NEVER... my fault...
DONT blame me!

I win!

Standing on edge,
I WANT THIS TO END!
I cant even be seen around you,
because you'll grab be and the pain
with start all over again!!
I have to remeber, its not my fault!
But it never helps...
Youre such a child fucker!
All you do is dream about kids
all fucking day!
You sick fuck!!
I hope you fucking burn in hell for this shit!
I win, and you lose!
Ive moved on, and youre what?
Sitting in your car, or your room...
Remebering all the "times we had with eachother"
All the time you fucked me up,
and screwed me over!
All the times I lost!
All the times I thought Id always lose,
to an unwinable game!
But guess what,
I WON and Im not scared of your sick ass!
BRING IT BITCH!
Cuz In the end, I always win.

Im me

Im me,
And youre you.
Polar opposites.
I want an answer,
for a cure to the pain!
When I scream,
when I hurl in disgust!
Im dirty!
Such a whore!
Such a slut!
Im me,
and youre you.
Only problem is...
Youre a child fucker
and Im the child you terrorized!
NO CHOICE!
FORCED!
NOT MY FAULT!
God wont save you!
Im me,
and youre you,
but fuck this, I win!

Lost Innocence

Never rape, only touch!
Arent I lucky?
Some would say...
But when I scorn,
and you frown...
I feel at fault...
I feel guilty...
ALL MY FAULT!
I feel sick!
Tears... well up in my eyes
But never leave...
PAIN! Inside..
Just want to die...
To make the pain go away!
ALL MY FAULT!
No, you've lied!
NOT MY FAULT!
Lost... Innocence...
mine...
Virginity, taken...
ALL MY FAULT!
WANT TO DIE!
NOT MY FAULT!
Make it stop...
Lost Innocence...

Touchy feely

Slid your hands down my pants!
Touch... feel...
I HAD NO CHOICE!
I FUCKING HATE YOU!
I hope you die!
Touch... feel...
I wish I'd have said it out loud...
Then you might have, just might have,
stopped while I still had a childhood...
But I never cried, and never will cry...
Nor will I scream...
I HAD NO CHOICE!
I FUCKING HATE YOU!
I hope you die!
Touch... feel...
You dont care!
You just want to get off!
use me for your sick, and twisted
mind!
Touch... feel...
Never again...
Never...
Again it happens!
And I want to cry, and I want
to scream!
But I dont...
But I wish I did...
I hate you...
And I hope you die...
It wasnt my fault..
Never blame me... Dad